I came back from vacation to find out my brother-in-law Ian had passed away.  The email came through my work email – it was a bit of a shock, and I really did not process it as it was my first day back to work – so I put it in a box in my head to deal with later.

Ian was married to my late sister Mary, which in itself is enough to bring on the tears as she died when she was 42.

I have such wonderful memories of Ian – growing up -they lived in Westmount in Montreal – he was the coolest brother in law – I think I had a crush on him – I remember spending summers there – with the boys – Trevor and Jamie from Ian’s first marriage.  Occasionally his daughter Melissa would stay as well.

He took us to to Florida, camped down east, hot dogs in Algonuin Park, Christmas in Montreal, a trip to Europe in an RV – except it was rented in England and in Europe you drive back on the other side of the road – played cards with the boys, read, went to Belgium, Switzerland, down the Rhine through Germany to Italy, and up along the Riviera to France.  I still have my diary from the trip.   I don’t know how Ian put up with us all, he was always so patient and loving and kind, even when we drove him nuts.  I have the best memories of a summer in Maine on the Ocean where he rented a summer-house – Mary and the boys and I stayed all summer and Ian would fly down and be with us whenever he could.  I remember a time when his dad visited – another amazing gentleman which is where I am sure Ian got all his worldly ways. I was behaving rather precosiously (awkward teenager) and felt so bad after for disappointing him.

We moved to Port Credit from North York, and they moved from Montreal to Toronto to a wonderful house off St Claire West, and then later to a house on Roxborough Avenue.  I was always made to feel welcome, Mary loved to bake for Thanksgiving, and Christmas and Ian was always so supportive of anything she wanted to do.   He tried to teach me an appreciation for wine, golfing, books, we had some great talks on the back patio.

He loved his boys and Melissa.  Jamie and Trevor are two very special guys – and very different, I always felt family was always very important to Ian.

As a young adult – I didn’t see as much of them – I met my husband Gord and lived with them again before I headed up north to Gravenhurst.  It was around this time that Mary lost twins in pregnancy.  At 20 or 21 I really had no idea the loss she suffered, but Ian and Jamie found a lovely yellow lab puppy – named Colby, that helped her tremendously and brought a lot of joy into their lives.  Unfortunately living in the city, there was one neighbour next door that Colby didn’t like, the neighbours complained to the city – and Colby came north to live with Gord and I, where he continued to bring joy into our lives, as well as our children Allan and Amanda.  He lived to be 15 or 16?  Mary and Ian had great visits with him whenever they came up to visit.

I remember when Gord took Ian on a northern fishing trip, honestly, Ian was a golfer, lol, and I couldn’t really see Ian roughing it at a northern lake in God knows where? I think Ian had to sit on the beer at the back of the plane to keep the balance, the shocks went in the car on the trip, and needless to say, there are great jokes of the pilot, the chef, the landing  in the lake, and the size of the fish they caught.  I will have to find the pictures.  He and Gord spent some time golfing at the various golf courses, the Sands.  Mary tried to golf…I don’t think it is a Glover thing.

Ian and Mary were able to retire at a young age – they took off in a wonderful fifth wheel to travel to Arizona, and settle in the summer in Kelowna.  They had a very special time in their lives before Mary passed away.  Ian understandably went a little off the wall.  Gord and I went to the wedding of Jamie and Laura in Kingston.  We had an amazing time, and made some good memories.

Ian and I  stayed in touch, and he was a good emotional support after my husband Gord passed away.  Who knew that Gord at 49, would also pass away at a young age?  Ian would come to visit, and my kids have a special place in their heart for their Uncle Ian.

I was so glad for him when he settled back in Kingston.  Closer to where his boys were.  I remember when he first told me of the volunteer work he was doing in Kingston..his memorial site is here.  There is a  link to the  news video of the dedication of the shelter in his name on his memorial site. I remember that Ian was a  Big Brother as well.

The last time I spoke with him, he talked about a family Christmas, where everyone was getting together, how he was going to be a great granddad again, he sounded so happy and I was so very glad for him.

I am sure my memories are a little different, and there are many more memories that will come to mind over time- it is important to take the time to remember ….how we remember our loved ones is unique to ourselves.  I loved him, he will always be in my heart.